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Healthier Alternatives to your eating habits.

I haven’t tried all of these, so I can’t vouch.  I know for my tuna salad that I make I do a mix of olive oil and mustard instead of mayo, but I don’t know in what universe Mustart is a straight up alternative to Mayonnaise.

For Salads, Avocado and Almonds are a great way to beef up the salad without adding bread!


I wouldn’t consider these hacks so much as straight-up substitutions that miss the mark in a lot of ways.

1. Contributes to the gentrification and wholesale pricing-out of South American indigenous communities who have relied on quinoa as a staple food for centuries, if not millennia, and now are starving as they can no longer afford it

2. I like mustard but there’s no way in hell it serves the same purpose in cooking that mayonnaise does. Mustard can’t emulsify shit.

3. Tea’s good, but I don’t know many people who drink it straight. If you sweeten it you might as well still be drinking pop (and you don’t even get the benefit of carbonation for a textural variant).

4. sure, if you want everything you eat to taste like suntan lotion

5. I can dig this one. Greek-style yogurt’s good stuff.

6. nut allergies, yo (I don’t have them, but my brother does).

7. Air-popped popcorn tastes like air, and if you do flavor it it defeats the whole purpose of choosing it over potato chips.

8. what the hell is it with people and coconuts lately I mean criminy. I suppose it’s a good alternative for those with gluten allergies, but while I do love the taste of dessert-prepared coconut, I can’t get over the sunscreen aftertaste I’ve gotten from these other derivatives.

9. Eh. I tried using stevia, it does weird things to my blood sugar levels. I had a lot more hypoglycemic episodes whenever I ate something with it. If we used cane sugar instead of beet sugar, we probably wouldn’t have so many problems, but the latter’s more easily mass produced.

10. What the actual fuck. Cacao nibs taste like bitter ass on a shit platter BECAUSE they have no sugar. They’re what’s left over from the chocolate-making process. The only way I could even see anyone substituting cacao nibs for real chocolate is if they hate flavor and probably kick puppies for fun.

Then again, this is all from Self magazine’s site, so harebrained food “advice” is pretty par for the course.

The cacao nibs seems outlandish, seeing as pretty much everyone in the fitness community uses actual chocolate chips when making healthy foods. Otherwise, everything else on the list makes sense. If you cook with coconut oil your food won’t automatically taste like the inside of an almond joy, same with coconut flour. Replacing mayo with mustard is usually as a condiment on sandwiches, not for making sauces or dressings and what not. Adding flavoring to popcorn doesn’t defeat the purpose because you still feel like you’re eating the same amount, but actually eating a fraction compared to chips. The whole tea vs. soda thing is stupid. Just fucking drink water.

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